FIRST FORTNIGHT: IF I HAD LEGS I’D KICK YOU Director: Mary Bronstein 113 mins, 2025, USA, Digital. Watch trailer Book cinema tickets Rose Byrne gives a performance of blistering intensity in Mary Bronstein’s extraordinary second feature; a white-knuckle ride into the psyche of a woman on the brink of despair, If I Had Legs I’d Kick You is a brave, formally daring, and entirely unforgettable experience. Byrne plays Linda, a psychoanalyst caring for her critically ill daughter who must relocate to a dingy hotel when a burst pipe causes her apartment ceiling to cave in. Her husband (Christian Slater, appearing only as a nagging voice on her phone) is away, and she must single-handedly juggle hospital visits with treating her clients, while monitoring repairs to the gaping hole in the roof. Her own therapist (a baleful Conan O’Brien) offers little support, and, leaning into drugs and alcohol, Linda careens towards a point of crisis. Notes by David O’Mahony Director: Mary Bronstein 113 mins, 2025, USA, Digital. Watch trailer